Wierd but True! Part 3

So here's another installment in the series of Wierd but True - my adventures with the niqab.

I went to Buffalo, NY for a shopping trip - as its a hop, skip and a jump away from Mississauga. La lalala, im strolling through Marshalls, randomly checking out the collection. I notice a 50+ woman, ogling me but I ignore as im used to being ogled at. She did some more ogling, and then some more till I guess she couldnt take it anymore and she says, "Arent you feeling hot?" she looked way more flustered than I! Very politely I replied "No, I'm not" (thanks for asking?). She walks off, while i was answering but then she comes back for seconds! "You are in the United States now, you dont have to do this (points to niqab) - you are beautiful!" She was actually spewing the "compliment". Very frustrated and caught a little by suprise, as i wasnt expecting her to return so quick I said "Yes, I know I'm beautiful. Thank you very much", as enthusiastically as i could. Obviously she didnt wait for my reply. Apparently, the "empathetic" advice was meant to sound like an insult.
I was fuming! Then I tried to relax myself and all the possible comebacks start coming to my head. Im thankful, atleast i was polite. I kept my cool (albeit on the outside). Allah didnt let me down in my eyes and hopefully in His eyes.
Same day, on the way back we stopped for a bite at Niagara. While sitting outside a shawarma place, a "Muslim" lady tells me " Can i say something?" Oh boy! "Why you have to do this? Its not in Islam. I mean i understand the scarf, but Mohammad (saw) didnt say to so this." Ya Allah! Twice in one day, I was on a roll. I explained, very briefly, how there are MANY reports of how the women dressed and the face veil being a part of that. She didnt want to believe me. "You are torturing yourself like this. Why are you giving your body pain" I said, "I havent been happier or more at peace, since i chose to wear the veil. My body is not getting tortured, nor am I in pain." She shrugged. Wow! People really only listen to what they want to - i could have just said laa dee daa and she wouldnt have known the difference.
Lesson: Always think ahead. I'm a poster for da'wah and i better accept that fact. Choose one of 2 things when answering a question: either invite to Tawheed, or simply show good manners.

Thats it for now folks... watch this space for more Inshallah... i live an exicting life Alhamdolillah!

Why don't you believe us?

When we walk down the streets wearing our "gowns" (abayas) and headscarves and face-veils (niqabs), we face everything from annoyed looks to stares and glares to outright nasty and hurtful comments. Yet, we persevere. We stand with you shoulder to shoulder at the school, doing the same tasks you do. We are behind you in the drive-thru, driving just like you. We struggle to balance matters of the home and outside, just like you.
But our presence insults you; as though we are lower beings. It irks some of you to the point, that you have the gall to tell us to go away. You point fingers at us, whisper about us in your friends ear, roll your eyes at us. Yes we can see and feel all that you throw our way. Yet, we persevere.

Our husbands/fathers and brothers are respectful in our presence, they thank us for the balancing act we perform everyday because they know Allah didnot burden the woman with chores. They credit the righteous upbringing of their children to us. We are incharge of our household and all its decisions, and they wilingly lend us their help. They walk ahead of us, as a show of their love for us so they may face your stares before we do.

Our covering and veil is to please our Lord - Allah! Not because we were forced by our husbands or fathers; but you dont believe our words. We speak our minds, only watchful to not say something to displease Allah. We do not confine ourselves to the standards of society, we are today's woman; but you don't believe our stance and you dont acknowledge our courage.

You oppress us - not our veils!

I'll see you when i get there

When i first heard that everyone will recognise each other in Jannah, even if they had only crossed each other's path once in this world - i didnt know how that would be. You see, i forget faces fast and names even faster! As a Jannah hopeful, i was wondering how i would recognise someone i saw at a supermarket etc - but as i know Allah's word is final and true, i accepted. SubhanAllah! Allah brought the answer in front of me. Off late i have been frequenting Islamic conferences around town Alhamdolillah. Also got an opportunity to participate in some events/ with some organisations and more than once i spotted people i had seen at a conference or a meeting elsewhere! A light bulb went on in my head - Just like this i will recognise the people from dunya. I may not know them or their name but i will know i have seen them before. Amazing, eh? Think about it: if you are working in the way of Allah, trying to be sincere and so is person X in the same country - chances are you will meet or see person X somewhere (sirat al mustaqeem is straight, afterall!) - and then if both of you were to enter Jannah Inshallah - you will recognise each other. WOW! So, here is what i will say to you - I'll see YOU when i get there :))

I Accept = I Submit

Have you heard the story of Yusuf AS? I mean, besides the part that he was so handsome SubhanAllah, that women cut themselves! In short, Yusuf AS was thrown in a well by his brothers, out of jealousy, sold as slave, grew up in Egypt far away from his homeland and family, was unjustly sent to prison and then made made minister of agriculture upon release.
Imagine he was a pious god-fearing adolescent/teen, son of a prophet, the apple of his father's eye - yet when he's thrown in the land of mushriks, as a second-class citizen he does not complain ONCE. He accepts! When he is sent to prison, without ever having commit a crime, he doesnot complain - rather chooses his sentence over the fitna of the women. He accepts! He patiently awaits his release and continues his da'wah, even in prison. When he is released, he could easily have gone back home; instead he chooses to help the Egyptians with their agriculture and a famine he knew would strike soon. His patience and submission is exemplary! But why is this story in the Quran, why was our beloved Prophet SAW told about it, why are we told about it?
We may be in a situation that we did not choose, among people we'd rather not be with, in a circumstance we did nothing to deserve,  we may face persecution for our beliefs, and our good intention may be doubted BUT we must accept. We must know this is the will of Allah SWT, submit to it and hold steadfast; and keep on working. Just like Yusuf AS did.
Chin up soldier!

...but is it in the Qur'an?

Has anyone ever asked you "...but is this in the Qur'an?". It is one of the most annoying questions to be asked. I pity those people who ask them, because they don't even know that they are putting their Iman at risk by uttering such words. I'm currently working on a detailed document about hadith and sunnah, so i wont delve in those details right now. I will however Inshallah, prove why the belief in and practice of Hadith and Sunnah is just as important for our iman as is belief in Tawheed (oneness of Allah).... and yes! thats in the Qur'an.

Surah Al-Juma'h, Verse 2
He it is Who sent among the unlettered ones a Messenger (Muhammad SAW) from among themselves, reciting to them His Verses, purifying them (from the filth of disbelief and polytheism), and teaching them the Book (this Qur'an, Islamic laws and Islamic jurisprudence) and Al-Hikmah (As-Sunnah: legal ways, orders, acts of worship, etc. of Prophet Muhammad  SAW). And verily, they had been before in mainfest error 

All major scholars of Quran agree Al-Hikmah, refers to the Sunnah of the Prophet SAW.

Surah An-Nissa, Verse 59
O you who believe! Obey Allâh and obey the Messenger (Muhammad PBUH)

Surah An-Nissa, Verse 80
He who obeys the Messenger, has indeed obeyed Allah

Surah Aal Imran, Verse 31
Say (O Muhammad SAW to mankind): "If you (really) love Allah then follow me (i.e. accept Islamic Monotheism, follow the Qur'an and the Sunnah), Allah will love you and forgive you of your sins. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."

These are but a few of the commandments from the Quran, which order the ummah to obey the Prophet and in his love and obedience is the love and obedience of Allah.

The purpose of any messenger has been to explain to the people how to obey Allah, that was the whole point of sending a human being to preach rather than an angel or jinn. Prophet Muhammed SAW was a shy man, full of haya (modesty) and yet he laid bare his entire life for the ummah; just so they would learn from it. This was one of his many great sacrifices. Imagine, having a video camera following you for just one entire day. Imagine having no privacy. He did all this so we would learn the deen properly and for us to disregard his great sacrifice; is blasphemous. 

Even if you are unsure of a certain hadith that someone has related, the proper etiquette is to silence yourself. Go back and check the reference to ensure its authenticity - but as a Muslim, you do not have permission to argue over the word of the Prophet SAW. 

Surah Al Hujurat, Verse 2
O you who have believed, do not raise your voices above the voice of the Prophet or be loud to him in speech like the loudness of some of you to others, lest your deeds become worthless while you perceive not.

The scholars agree that today, when the Prophet SAW is not among us, but his Sunnah is (and will be till the end of time bi'iznillah), this applies to disagreeing with his sunnah. Allah clearly warns the believers, that if they speak over the prophet SAW, their good deeds will be in vain and they will not have realized it. Dear brothers and sisters, the consequences are grave and questioning the prophet's word is equal to disbelieving in him. Follow the above ruling. Inshallah, Allah will guide you because your intention was pure.Ya Allah, keep us on hidayah. Ameen ya rabbil Aalimeen.

I will leave you with another verse from the Qur'an. 


Surah An-Nissa, Verse 65
But no, by your Lord, they can have no Faith, until they make you judge in all disputes
between them, and find in themselves no resistance against your decisions, and accept (them)with full submission.

Wierd but True! Part 2

Canada has a (money-minting) graduated licensing system. So i had to get my "G" license before my G2 expired. I had given my G2 test with a really nice non-muslim MALE instructor. Since then, i have donned the niqab and gained more deeni (religious) perspective; so im feeling nervous about taking lessons without a mahram present. I make lots of dua that this deed doesnt go against me on the day of judegment. The guy comes to pick me, and i figured he wouldn't recognize me from my pre-niqab days. It had been 3 years AND i had moved. But he did! I had climbed down 2 flights of stairs and was very nervous, so i was a little out of breath. This is how he broached the topic. "If you dont mind, please dont mind i just want to tell you that the reason you have difficulty breathing is because you have this (niqab) on your face. Maybe you want to tie it a little lower. please dont mind." At first, I DID mind but then he continued. He is a sikh guy so wears the net around his beard. He said see i tie this (under his chin) and initially I had difficulty too. I was like yeah, ok, whatever. Then he asked me " you didnt use to wear this before, you only covered your head - whats with the change? is it a religious problem?" I was like yes! dawah opportunity. I explained that it was not a problem at all Alhamdolillah and i felt like taking it. So lesson1 ends with pretty much that.
Come time for lesson 2, and the instructor says can i ask you something. Whats one to say to that except go ahead. He asked me how should one pray, if they really want something to get done? I said, you should make dua and then have faith that what will unfold will be better for you. He was like no but this thing really needs to happen - like it cant not happen. He explained the situation to me. My answer was still the same. In my head though i was thinking how to gear this towards Tawheed. So, i told him if you are so hell-bent that it has to happen this way - why dont you go make it happen. Can you? he's like no. I said, so the fact that you need to ask God to help you - means He has some power that you dont? he's like yeah. Then i said you need to understand who Rabb is. You need to have faith in the one you are bowing down to. He is only one who can grant you anything, or take it away from you. I stressed the oneness a bit more. He wasnt fully convinced, i could tell. He almost had expected me to pull out a piece of paper he could tie somewhere, for his wish to be granted. When i said all he needed for faith, that seemed too simple.
Sadly thats the case with most of the ummah now. They simply dont believe in prayer. How much more hypocritical could you get if you are bowing to Allah and actually depending on people or chances?
Anyway, my deduction was that my niqab gave him the impression that i was a religious person and i have some magical answers. He must really have been desperate to ask a person of a different faith! I tried to tie his faith with tawheed as best i could. May Allah guide him.
ps: for those who dont know, he understands the word rabb and dua - since they exist in his language.

Wierd but True! Part 1

So this is part 1 in a series about my experiences with the niqab that are Wierd but true :) and above all could be loosely classified as da'wah.
I goto the bank to deposit a cheque (check for you Americans!). I hand in my driver's license for identification and the teller tells me oh you're so beautiful, is that why you cover your face? Im caught between feeling embarassed and puzzled as how to quickly answer this bizarre question. I laugh it off nervously. She tells me, all Muslims dont wear this - why is that? Oh my God, did she just ask me a fiqh question?? So, i politely say its a matter of personal choice and i like to do this (pointing to my face). Refer to my note about pre-thinking situations so you arent caught off-guard. I definitely was! (http://mariam-jannahseeker.blogspot.com/2011/10/walking-dawah-machine.html)
I exit the bank wondering, should i feel flattered that she complimented me? Ummmmm, a question that was to be answered in the coming months as i was to soon find out people LOVE telling you that you are beautiful as a way to compensate for the "oppression". And what a sexist remark to make anyway - ok so its either that im sooo beautiful that i feel the need to cover or that i'm sooooo unattractive that the world cannot bear to see me! Do these people not hear themselves? Ugh! disappointed in the standards the world has set to judge by appearances!

Wierd but True...watch this space for more.

The walking dawah-machine

Since I have worn the niqab, I have gotten more questions in one year than I did in 7+ years of wearing just the hijab.  There are one of two reasons people will question you, they are genuinely curious (rare) or they want to prove you are wrong/oppressed. Needless to say I have come across the latter more often. As aggravating as it is, I realized Allah SWT is fulfilling my very wish – I wanted to do dawah and now I get to dispense information about my deen and who knows who Allah will guide and I would have served as in instrument. 

An important thing to do is pre-think certain scenarios and the kinds of questions you could be asked. This is applicable to hijabis too, however having been on both sides of the spectrum;  I faced frequent and tougher critics after the niqab. I have learned it the hard way, and Alhamdolillah I walked away unscathed but there was definitely chance of some serious damage.  If I am going to be at the doctors where I have one-on-one time with doctor/nurse/assistant/technician; chances of being asked something are higher.  I strategize.  One very important point is that you will probably have 15 seconds to justify your point of view/ answer the question. Don’t go into details of hadith and sunnah – words which will mean nothing to a non-muslim. I was randomly asked at a breakfast place by the cook behind the counter:  How come you are wearing this (pointing to my niqab) and your friend is only covering her head? Yeah, I know! How do you answer that in 2 seconds? I did the best I could, I wish I was better prepared.

There is great deal of unawareness among the muslims today. I may be speaking of born-muslims only, though. Muslims are unaware of their impact or the light they carry. They are careless of it. It’s time to change and live like the ummah was meant to… with enlightenment, awareness, contemplation, conviction and honesty.

Alhamdolillah, my niqab has turned me into a walking dawah-machine and I love it, for the sake of Allah ofcourse.

TMI!

I'm not THAT old, i think! Afterall i grew up in the age of the internet - the reason for my very lame email ids; which i have not changed simply because i wanted to keep the contacts, etc Anyway, so although i'm not THAT old biologically but i think i may be aging faster mentally. I feel in this day and age, there is simply too much information - I dont know how one person can feel anything but overwhelmed; but maybe that was the purpose. There was a time in middle school (long long time ago); we had to do a write up on TV: boom or bust? As in, is the television really advantageous or has more cons. An argument which may be totally redundant now. I argued in favor of TV, saying parents could always control content on it (see told you im not THAT old), etc etc. The internet however, is a whole different monster. It is so vast and there are so many glitches with privacy sharing - i cannot wrap my mind around it. I apologize for this rant, but there is nothing you cant look up on the internet. I have an investigative nature, i try not to cross that line into "poking my nose in your business" type, and i am a self-proclaimed Google Queen. My friends and family come to me if they want to research anything and i usually find what they are looking for, which they couldn't find in that place and hence the title. Thank you. Anyway so since im so investigative, I just click and click and click and sometimes find information i should totally not have access to. I manage to pull myself back but I wonder do those people realize i know and can know so much more about them?! Technology has its advantages, i think those are apparent and i dont need to discuss them. The cons, however, are not discussed that often. My husband is an IT guy, and he is the most paranoid person when it comes to privacy and he wouldn't trust the internet for a second.
During the khilafa of Omar RA, once on a routine walk around the city, he chanced upon a house where people were drinking. His companion was outraged and said how dare these people transgress while you are khalifa. Omar RA was a no-nonsense kind of guy and one would expect him to be even more outraged than his companion. His response, instead was lets ask forgiveness from Allah for we have witnessed what was none of our business (not verbatim). You see where im going with this.
A picture is worth a thousand words - ummmmm, not true entirely. Imagine someone took a picture of you and posted it on facebook - and the scene was not appropriate. It could be one of 1000 things, you could have been exiting the place, you could have regretted that event and ask for forgiveness from Allah, you could have just been snapped at an angle which makes it look like that, you could have been there by mistake, you could be changed person since then... but what will the viewer think? Not the best, thats for sure.
So although i have related Omar RA's character, we must protect ourselves too. The internet is a vast and complicated monster and in envelopes you in ways you dont know; and with so much floating around, you dont care.
With access to technology, comes responsibility. Check yourself, limit exposure if you feel you cannot control yourself, be aware of whats out there. As muslims, we must look out for one another. Defaming and backbiting, both are prohibited so its beside the point if someone did something or not. Find ways to "halalify" your usage, do not blindly forward content without checking its source.
Yeah im definitely ageing faster mentally! But i genuinely care about muslim youth (and some not so youthful) who are so ignorant of the prints their actions leave :(
May Allah protect me and you from TMI!