Surah Al-Qasas Verse 83

Notes taken at a brief session by Ustad AE. All Glory and praise is for Allah SWT alone, all good comes from Him and all faults are from my own self. These are my personal notes and not to be taken as Ustad's word verbatim.

Ayah 83 Surah Al Qasas :  That home of the Hereafter We assign to those who do not desire exaltedness upon the earth or corruption. And the [best] outcome is for the righteous. main focus of talk

The entire quran is relevant to every person. Even though Allah may be talking about the disbelievers or even firawn, if we analyse the ayah; it will apply to us and we will learn something for ourselves from it. So we can never look at a verse and say that it isn’t talking about me. Every muslim should try to find the message for them in every ayah.

The above verse speaks about 2 qualities, the absence of which is the cause for a “good  end” – “al –‘aaqibah” These 2 qualities are status/power and  corruption - ‘uluw and fasaad .  These 2 qualities are linked in the Quran in multiple places; and one does cause the other. The greed for power will cause corruption, whether willingly or otherwise. Islam does not allow the means to be justified by the end – hence one cannot take wrong measures to attain power in order to “fix” things – because he is causing fasaad, even though it may be unintentionally.

To understand the real and true meaning of a “good end”, a muslim must first fathom that this dunya is not meant to be comfortable and fun. According to the hadith of the Prophet SAW, this world is a “sijn” (prison) for the believer and Jannah for the disbeliever. Why did the prophet use “sijn”, he could have said its hard.. the idea he wanted us to grab is all the things a prison is associated with is exactly what this dunya is : so its not meant to be fun, or luxurious and its meant to be uncomfortable, strange, unjust, cruel, stifling, etc etc. The kuffar along with shaytan are making it a paradise for themselves, and want to drag you into it so you spend this life making this prison into Jannah when it can never be. Once you come to terms with what this dunya is, 1) you accept your circumstances and difficulties because you say I know its suppose to be tough 2) you know a better end, the best end awaits you. That is what the “good end” truly means. It is the only “good end” .. and it is for those who are not arrogant and don’t cause corruption/oppression.

These words are usually associated with political figures/ heads of states, etc but as stated earlier everything in the Quran is relevant to you. So you have to see how you are seeking status among people and how you are/could be the cause of someones’ or your own destruction.
One of the tools of destruction that the kuffar have employed is “interest”. It is the greatest oppression of its kind; however we must analyse why and how we get ourselves in situations which trap us in interest. Why are we so materialistically attached to this dunya (remember its supposed to be a prison!) that we must get ourselves into debt. Debt cannot be forgiven by Allah, because it is a right of the person you have borrowed from and only he can forgive it to you.

Having wealth or status is not impermissible and it has always existed and will always exist – it is the arrogance and feeling superior and demeaning others which is meant by the above verses.

Ibn Taimiyyah divided the people into 4 groups in his explanation of the ayah,
1)      Those who seek power and destruction eg bashar al assad
2)      Those who desire corruption without elevation, such as the thieves and criminals from the riff-raff amongst the people.
3)      The third type: Those who desire elevation without corruption, such as those who have the deen, they desire to elevate themselves by it over other than them amongst the people.
4)      Those who seek neither : this is the group that the good end is for. These people don’t want fame and don’t seek for themselves to be known, rather only spread the word and name of Allah. They would gladly give up what is rightfully theirs in order to maintain peace and are of those who join people not cause divide. Eg. Hasan ibn Ali RA who gave up his khilafa because not doing so would have spent the lives of 1000s of people although every companion would have backed him.
Al- Aali is Allah’s name and ‘uluw is His attribute and only He can have it.

Forgiveness - Giving it is getting it!

Forgiveness is one of those things that is easier said than done. As a younger person i believed in the mantra ‘forgive but never forget’. As I grew older (and wiser) I knew it was not possible to truly forgive without forgetting. Understanding this did not mean i was able to forgive – rather i now knew my weakness. I knew that every so often, I am reminded of the wrong I was done and ill-feelings even if not hate, start trickling into my heart.  So i tried blocking the memories and it worked for a while. Till I grew older still *sigh* (and wiser still!) and realised it was not possible to block memories as they make their way into your life and thinking at some point catching you off-guard.

So here is where I am now – dealing with the memories; accepting it as the will of my Creator which in some form were meant to purify me (hopefully they did). Once I came to terms with my past experiences, no longer feeling vulnerable or guilty or vengeful; I was ready to forgive. But the question was why should I? Why should I forgive people who brought about so much pain and misery? Why should i give them the satisfaction of feeling ok about what they did? Maybe if i forgive them, they will never know or pay for what they did? These are all the emotions and questions I go through every now and then.

Then moments of enlightenment like today’s jummah khutba happen. The khateeb talks about forgiveness as a means to leading a content life. If i know one thing about anger, it is that it makes you discontent.  The khateeb tells us that forgiving is not letting go rather it is taking control of the situation. You are incharge of how that relationship (or lack thereof) shapes up. A person who has hurt you deeply will tend to do it again. When you acknowledge your hurt and turn to Allah for solace and forgive for the sake of Allah; you are no longer in a position to be hurt again because you have already taken a higher road – a path that people who wrong you don’t tread.  Forgiving means you free yourself of emotions that do not serve you.

And let not those of virtue among you and wealth swear not to give [aid] to their relatives and the needy and the emigrants for the cause of Allah, and let them pardon and overlook. Would you not like that Allah should forgive you? And Allah is Forgiving and Merciful. [Surah Al Noor Verse 22]

Here is my game plan – I will consciously think about my shortcomings and sins. I will think about how I would like to be standing in front of Allah SWT on the Day of Judgement with those sins and those shortcomings? Will I be able to justify any of it? Then I will think how it would be like to have all those sins forgiven! Everytime I have an ill-feeling creeping up, I will try and do this – I will forgive so that I may be forgiven. Allah knows how much forgiveness I need! It is indeed from Allah’s mercy to even allow us to forgive – just so He can bestow us with His forgiveness in return. Have you heard of a more merciful Lord!

Please make dua for me and for yourself if any of this hit home with you – may Allah clean our hearts and make us of the forgiving and forgiven. Ameen!

And hasten to forgiveness from your Lord and a garden as wide as the heavens and earth, prepared for the righteous. Who spend [in the cause of Allah] during ease and hardship and who restrain anger and who pardon the people - and Allah loves the doers of good;[Surah Aal Imran, verse 133-134]

Boyz to Men

How many times have you felt like having husband is like raising another child? Its one of those universal truths we have come to accept. We have come to the point where we even start acting like mothers with them. I might add most of this content may be true for south-east Asian families. In the process of raising 2 sons, I am constantly trying to learn from my upbringing and its pros and cons – trying to find a better way to raise responsible men. I think it will take a few generations of conscientious mothers to make it a better world J

While reading the seerah I was amazed at how mature and self-sufficient all the young men were. Even our prophet sallallahu alaihi wassalam, was already an established, albeit not rich, but well-respected person by the tender age of 25. True, those times were different – but why should maturity suffer over generations. What I realized and im sure ive blogged about this before is, that this world dumbs down our children and in turn so do we. We are never willing to realize our sons are growing up. We realize it when they’ve already grown and perhaps even grayed! We don’t place any responsibility on them, because they are studying or working. What logic is that? What is their education worth, if they are irresponsible or unable to take care of their most basic needs. Mothers especially, are driving themselves insane running errands for their children along with prepping piping hot meals, running laundry loads etc. Then when the son is 15+, the same doting mothers are complaining about how the “child” doesn’t even pick up his socks! These same sons get married, and we have the wives whining about the socks. Another thing our men are incapable of is dealing with extended family dynamics. They have absolutely no idea why the wife is so upset that he doesn’t feel the need to attend his brother in laws wedding.

It may be too late to “fix” the husband lol, but lets do the world a favor and try and raise men. I basically back-tracked to our own childhood to see what wrongs can be made right. Here are a few things I’ve realized and am trying or will try. It’s very important to place age-appropriate responsibility on my children. They may do it wrong and my urge to fix it will be strong – but that will not teach them anything. I would rather show them how it’s done and then let them take and feel the ownership of the task. Some parenting websites list age-related chores – we may or may not choose to follow it to a tee – however it’s a good starting point. We should talk to our children – discuss our feelings with them. I tell my children when I’m not feeling well or even angry. They need to know that their mother and later on their wife is not super-women. We should involve our kids in extended family/ family friend dynamics. I try and let them know why we are visiting someone or they are visiting us. For example, if I am going to congratulate someone for getting married or having a baby – I will tell my children. Similarly, I will and have told them if someone passes away and how I felt about it. Not nitty gritty details, just getting them familiar with the concept. I would say that once my child is 10, I would make him even speak to the person I am congratulating or giving condolences to. How else will he learn what he is supposed to do? I remember feeling so so awkward when I had to give condolences for the first time. I just didn’t know the right words. I would hope my sons wouldn’t have to go through the same. When my husband was travelling, I would speak to my sons about missing him and how they should be more caring toward me in his absence. This may sound like im emotionally blackmailing them – it wasn’t as bad really. I don’t become emotional or weepy while saying it. It’s said once and it’s said in a very matter-of-factly kind of way. I talk to my sons about my hijab and why they cant let anyone in without asking/telling me (im not talking about opening the main door to strangers here!). Sometimes I ask them how my dress looks or how I look – I don’t do this often but I like their shy faces when they answer it J I would hope as they grow older, they will shoulder responsibility, value time and money and value emotions most importantly. Above all, make du’a for them – not just for their success and education but for them to be good people. We must not assume that just is simply because they are our children. Mercy is from Allah SWT and we must beg for it for ourselves and our generations.

I remember reading a quote “It's not our job to toughen our children up to face a cruel and heartless world. It's our job to raise children who will make the world a little less cruel and heartless.” -L.R. Knost

But finally, all my efforts are for my own salvation. As the hadith states

“Upon death, man’s deeds will stop except for three deeds, namely: a continuous charitable fund, endowment or goodwill; knowledge left for people to benefit from; and a pious righteous and God-fearing child who continuously prays to Allah, for the souls of his parents” (Muslim).